Kombat

Mortal Kombat 4 : Krazy Kombat!

[Credits sequence. Screen is entirely black, and then it slowly pans upwards to show hundreds upon hundreds of needlessly mutilated corpses. Blood seeps out of the corpses onto the ground to form the title in a stylised blood-font. After it has been on-screen for a few moments, a huge explosion rips apart the corpses and the flying limbs wash away the blood.]

[First scene. Sub-Zero and some other new pointless character are standing at the docks.]

Sub-Zero : So, another Mortal Kombat tournament.
New Guy : Yes. This is my first.
Sub-Zero : Really.
New Guy : Yes.
[Note : no emotion or acting skill can be displayed here. Acting must be so wooden that entire forests are put out of business.]
Sub-Zero : I see.
[Scorpion is moving stealthily across a roof or whatever. Despite being killed in every Mortal Kombat film and in fact being nothing more than a skull in a mask, he is nevertheless still alive and trying to kill people for reasons the "plot" fails to explain.]
Scorpion : Get over here!
[Scorpion fires his wrist-missile thing and pulls in Sub-Zero. They fight for no reason, even though Scorpion is actually pursuing Quan Chi who freed the Oni Moloch from Outworld (or the Netherrealm) and is in league with Shang Tsung to rise the Dragon King's ancient army while at the same time Cyrax is trying to recover an orb for the Vampire whose name I can't remember which is in lava. In addition to all of this, the other Oni (the smelly one) is being plauged by flies.]

[Second scene. Raiden is trying to recruit people for his weatherman club while trying to impress them with his lightning tricks. He is unaware that everyone can see the hydroelectric plant behind him supplying him with all his "power".]

Raiden : We must unite to defeat this new enemy!
Bo' Rai Cho : What is the problem this time? If it involves burgers, count me in? You've all seen my fatality, haven't you?

[Collective sigh.]

Raiden : Yes Bo' Rai. We've all seen you literally flatten someone down to one pixel with your bulk. Anyway, back to the plot.
Jax : Plot?
Raiden : This time, some evil-doers are trying to take over the world by winning the Mortal Kombat tournament!

[Dramatic drum-beats.]

Bo' Rai Cho : How does that work? How does winning a tournament let you rule the world?
Raiden : I honestly have no idea.