Turbo
Have you ever wished you could play Scalextric on your computer? If not, you must live a shallow life indeed.
But, if like the rest of us you have always wanted to move your favourite hobby onto Cyberspace, your chance now exists! The fantastic game of "Turbo Cars"!
Firstly, this game barely runs on the shitty computers the school furnishes us with to try and embrace modern technology. Since these take a good few minutes to load up even Internet Explorer, perhaps we were being foolish in thinking this would actually work. Upon turning it down to the lowest resolution, finding out what the actual keys were and reducing all graphical features, it finally worked.
You can choose from a variety of different tracks, all of which are "completely different". These range from Figure of 8 to Figure of 8 Big and Figure of 8 Huge. That's some exciting shit right there, folks!
These different tracks are played in a variety of different areas. These range from a fairly ordinary house-hold like the one in the photo to what appears to be an ancient Egyptian tomb, complete with a sarcophagus. I'm not one to question the factual and historical inaccuracy of the game, but did the ancient Egyptians really play Scalextric in-between building some of the most incredible structures known to man? I sincerely doubt it.
Once you got over the excitement of different/identical tracks, you can then choose the camera angle. The favourite option seemed to be the one shown in the picture, which only showed the car in the lead. This meant the player who was losing had no sight of his shitty little car and could only guess what to do.
But that didn't matter, because this game was 100% luck. In order to win, you simply hold down the "forward" key and hope you fly off the track a little less than you opponent. No tactics are required. No fancy skills and handbrake turns needed. You could even turn off the computer screen while holding down the keys and you wouldn't miss out on the excitement! The blank computer screen might even be better!
When you finally come to closing the game, you'll find there doesn't seem to be a logical method to get rid of the damned thing. After flailing at the keys we finally managed to get rid of it and swore never again to play Turbo Cars.
Should we have more Shareware reviews in the future?
But, if like the rest of us you have always wanted to move your favourite hobby onto Cyberspace, your chance now exists! The fantastic game of "Turbo Cars"!
Firstly, this game barely runs on the shitty computers the school furnishes us with to try and embrace modern technology. Since these take a good few minutes to load up even Internet Explorer, perhaps we were being foolish in thinking this would actually work. Upon turning it down to the lowest resolution, finding out what the actual keys were and reducing all graphical features, it finally worked.
You can choose from a variety of different tracks, all of which are "completely different". These range from Figure of 8 to Figure of 8 Big and Figure of 8 Huge. That's some exciting shit right there, folks!
These different tracks are played in a variety of different areas. These range from a fairly ordinary house-hold like the one in the photo to what appears to be an ancient Egyptian tomb, complete with a sarcophagus. I'm not one to question the factual and historical inaccuracy of the game, but did the ancient Egyptians really play Scalextric in-between building some of the most incredible structures known to man? I sincerely doubt it.Once you got over the excitement of different/identical tracks, you can then choose the camera angle. The favourite option seemed to be the one shown in the picture, which only showed the car in the lead. This meant the player who was losing had no sight of his shitty little car and could only guess what to do.
But that didn't matter, because this game was 100% luck. In order to win, you simply hold down the "forward" key and hope you fly off the track a little less than you opponent. No tactics are required. No fancy skills and handbrake turns needed. You could even turn off the computer screen while holding down the keys and you wouldn't miss out on the excitement! The blank computer screen might even be better!
When you finally come to closing the game, you'll find there doesn't seem to be a logical method to get rid of the damned thing. After flailing at the keys we finally managed to get rid of it and swore never again to play Turbo Cars.
Should we have more Shareware reviews in the future?
posted by Mkzrj at 5:00 pm
5 Comments:
I'll have you know that victory in TurboCars requires the greatest skill.
I should know, I beat Chris 4 times in a row. Out of 4 races. 100% wins. Ha. We raced on "Huge Figure of 8", "Alpha", "Zero" something else with a truly inspired name.
They should sell this game in GAME. I would buy it.
10/10
This game should be under the platinum section. This game should be re-released with another name but nothing else different. This game should be available on all platforms (even on a command prompt only system).
I like this game.
Looks... exciting... *stares at tumbleweed*
finally i get broadband
fucking hell that took ages and ive forgotten my password for blogger
Inspired comment my friend.
Turbo-Cars is horse-shit.
Post a Comment
<< Home