Sunday, August 06, 2006

Decade

I recently read an article in the Guardian about predictions for the next ten years. This specifically related to the aftermath of the "Middle East Crisis", but I think it could be applied for various other things. So here are my predictions for the next ten years. That's from now until 2016 if you couldn't work that one out. If that is the case, please leave. There is nothing for you here.

The NHS.
The NHS leadership is currently going through a series of transitions, from Halfwit -> Fuckwit -> Hewitt. I don't think it can possibly get any worse, so it's bound to go uphill. Or maybe, under New Labour or the Tories we might change to the stunning American system - because ofcourse the poor aren't worthy of healthcare. Sometimes in the UK we forget that the rich are more important to keep alive than the poor. Silly Brits.

The Middle East.
Well, I read one suggestion that Hilary Clinton will win the next election, she'll bomb Natanz, everything will go crap, doomsday will be upon us, the Americans will go and attack everyone like they do against all foreigners and homosexuals, then...
Getting a little CJ deja vu from that picture of her.




What do I actually think? Well, it'll go down one of two roads :
A) The Israeli war machine will continue to kill everything, America and Britain will stand by/watch/help, they'll establish another regime in south Lebanon, and everything will be shit. This is the more likely.
B) They'll be an international outcry from those whose sisters and mothers aren't the same people, and Israel will pull out. Also, Britney Spears will become President and Mel Gibson will stop making obscure religious films.

The Environment
We're screwed.

Governments
Three points of mention here - England, the USA, and Cuba. Yes, Cuba.
England : When Tony Blair eventually realises we all hate him and he's going insane (seriously, look at a recent picture of him. He looks like that serial killer bloke with the crazy head), he might step down and let Gordon Brown take over. Unfortunately, because public opinion sees that Labour are no better than the Tories, if indeed worse now, the next election might see the Conservatives return to power. Not good.
USA : When George Bush is forced to leave after his first non-illegal term of office, we'll be split between two equally crap candidates. The Republican one, on account of being Republican will be another warmongering fool no doubt, but so will Hilary Clinton. One prediction had her bombing Iran rather than Bush. Either way, the next 4 years don't look much better.
Cuba : Incredible arrogance. The US government claims to be bravely "standing by" to "help" Cuba into a democracy. It seems to me Cuba has improved under a single party state - better health-care and education that much of the US. That is to say, fingers are not required for mathematics. I just hope Cuba can hold onto what makes it what it currently is.

----

It has come to my attention that some people thought the previous advert was real. I will never, ever put adverts on this site. I would much rather people continue to enjoy my blog than I make some meagre amounts of money from a site linking to products from some dubious company in eastern Europe.
I was sure the quote "I've always wanted to fly around the world in a roast chicken anus" should have persuaded people it was not real, but apparently not. Strange folk.
Also, I've been informed that I've been a bit of a cretin when it comes to image hosting. For any of you on rubbish connections, I apologise.

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Hilary Clinton gets into office, she will remove all fun from America.
Games will be banned if they involve any trace of combat.
Films will be the same.

All freedom (not that America actually has any as it is) will go. Ah well, it'll be localised in America.

9:06 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

People with poor net connections (mine's only poor in xbox live, before a few people start moaning at me) don't deserve to enjoy this blog. Its not exactly expensive or hard to get broadband. Continue making this blog painfully slow for poor connection!!!

Also, come the next US election, we be buggered. End of. Apocalypse. Doomsday. Armageddon. We need Bruce Willis.

9:22 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, this is a form of capitalism on the net. Poor connection don't matter. Only the people with the best matter. Just like in America. Only the rich are important. Woo.

9:23 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear tom:

A silly prejudice against people on dial-up is no excuse to waste everyone's bandwidth.

The point about the image hosting was that yesterday the blog's main page totalled almost 1MB of images.

This is clearly insanely huge.

10:05 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I couldn't disagree more.

11:10 am  

Post a Comment

<< Home