ET

Before today's update, I'd like to take a moment for you to consider a few things. What would happen if you convinced someone you had a snail fetish? What would happen if you went to an Atlantean dentist? Are you cowed by dwarven political infighting? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, no or maybe, play the Story of WTF now!
Scroll down one entry to find it. You may need to lower security settings, enable java, enable cookies, etc. Some people have been having problems with it...

Celebrities consider : The Alien

Bruce Willis on Aliens

Let's see now, how many aliens have I fought...well, there were those mechanical guys in the Fifth Element like something outta Thunderbirds. They were cool. And they had those little key-fingers, didn't they? That film started off really good, but it got a bit crap when the crazy rap singer and the blue woman with gold in her stomach appeared. That was just crazy.
Do I think aliens exist? Of course they do. It would be absurd if they didn't. But if they cross us, be sure the USA is going to kick them back to whatever planet they came from. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and campaign for John McCain.



Jimmy Carr on Aliens

Aliens! What a bloody daft idea. If they want to come to our planet they'd better be ready for some fucking idiot chasing them around the park with a bloody camera. The paparazzi. Now there's a group of morons if ever you needed them. Christ, we'd be lucky to ever recieve alien life. I mean, we go looking for intelligent life on other planets, but if the paparazzi and David Beckham are any guide, any aliens doing the same would surely miss us out.
Maybe they even avoid us! There might be life on Mars and they hide from us because we're too damned stupid! Speaking of which, play the Story of WTF now.


Disgruntled Alien on Aliens

Who comes up with these things? That's a bloody stupid question. Of course there are aliens!
What do they look like you ask?
There's one standing in front of you! True, my eyes are made from partially-clear plastic and I can be killed by the weakest of bacteria, but I'm still a proper alien.
What? You think Klingons are better? Sure, they have a full language which unbelievably sad people can learn, but...
You people have no bloody taste.


Rowan Williams on Aliens

I'm all for cultural diversity, obviously. The Pope doesn't speak for all of us. Even so, I can't help but worried our less-enlightened galactic brethren might have some bizarre beliefs.
Not to offend cultural sensitivities, I'll just say that maybe they haven't seen the light.
Who knows what they think? Maybe they have some crazy idea that the Universe was created in a "Big Bang", and that it's been expanding for 14 billions years since then!
I wonder if I'll be the one to build the first intergalactic Church.


Pat Robertson on Aliens

There is no such thing as an Extraterrestrial. All UFO believers should be killed - stoned, infact - because it is simply absurd. There is never going to be another creature in the Universe.
What? That alien? That's just made of cardboard or something. Oh look, now he's getting out a probe. That's just a Hollywood prop-

-Unintelligible screaming-